From the midst of a deep funk

I spent all of November deeply immersed in learning Adobe Illustrator. I would wake up each morning filled with purpose, jump out of bed, make some coffee and start on the next series of Lynda tutorials. I would create and learn and feel satisfied - like I was building my own stepping-stone path one small paver at a time. And each step was solid and sure, but I could only see two feet ahead of me. But when I finished and it was time to move onto Photoshop, the zing just left me in one great whoosh. I just couldn't find the motivation and the drive. It all felt futile and so small. I was trying to teach myself the very basic, minimum technical requirements and enter the tightly-packed graphic design field against 22-yr-olds with degrees and years of experience. 

So I stopped and I've been sitting here for a couple weeks now. Before me there seems to be a great swamp, full of sucking mud and danger, and I have no idea which direction to place my next step in. 

This is pretty much how I feel right now... so I turned it into an art print: